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The Seven Signs That He’s a Fuck Boy
You’re so gay and you don’t even like boys… that was Katy Perry’s song about the pussification of today’s men, a tongue in cheek way of pointing out how straight men have regressed into a bunch of simps over the last two generations. It goes deeper than just being an emo hipster, a sensitive thug, or that one guy who prefers to sit down to pee because he doesn’t want backsplash getting on his new J’s. This is the age of the Fuck Boy. The term, like all words from the nig’tionary, has taken on way too many meanings to keep up with at this point. It’s kinda like “Ho” where people just throw it out there to and make it fit whatever they want. A girl can call a dude a Fuck Boy because he didn’t want to commit after sex, when a commitment wasn’t even discussed. One guy can call another a Fuck Boy for not wanting to put up money to invest in a business idea, even though that idea doesn’t even have a proper business plan. A misogynistic man or a bitter basica could even call me a Fuck Boy for exposing the Dick Tactics game men run or telling women that they can’t place blame on ain’t shit men for their poor romantic judgment. The point is, people love to throw out “Fuck Boy” to mean any and everything because their vocabulary is about as lite as the Real Redbones of Potomac.

I want to focus on Fuck Boys, meaning bitch-ass-male-behavior due to insecurity. That’s my definition, if you got your own then take your ass over to Urban Dictionary. A Fuck Boy is an insecure little boy who doesn’t know how to be a man, that hides behind ego and lies while utilizing manipulation tactics to make himself seem greater than what he truly is. Instead of looking inward to Man Up, he lives life like he’s always PMS’ing. I take that back, these dudes whine like babies when they catch a common cold, so they wouldn’t even be strong enough to handle cramps, but they do have mood swings. Fuck Boys lie about everything, make excuses instead of moves, always w...

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