Woman 1: Dates one man at a time and claims she doesn't have the "energy" to deal with multiple guys... in reality, she's not too busy or too tired; she lacks the confidence.
Woman 2: Thinks "dating" means "fucking" and treats the talking stage like it's a real relationship because society has brainwashed her to be overly loyal... even when that man isn't officially yours.
Woman 3: Understands the concept of having options and knows that men want you more when other guys are after you. She understands that SINGLE is SINGLE and sex isn't on the table. Which means she can and will talk to that guy she met at a concert, go on a date with a guy from a dating app, and then accept a date offer from the guy DMing. None of these men are her "man" they're interviewing for the position. There is no blind loyalty because these men "like" her. There is only the power of choice.
Think about your life. Are you Woman 1, Woman 2, or Woman 3?
He's not your man, he's just in the rotation... move accordingly
I was doing a Zoom advice session two weeks ago, and the woman laid out her love life: she had an ex-boyfriend trying to get back into her life. Then she had a guy she met online who had taken her out on three dates. She felt so guilty about going out with her ex, that she told the guy she was dating about it. He was upset... she apologized... and they ended up sleeping together for the first time that night.
After sex the guy distanced himself. Surprise surprise...
She was on the video call with me, trying to figure out how to get him back. Ma'am, you let a man you've only known for a month guilt you out of pussy. If someone ghosts you after sex, it's not the sex; it was decided by at least the second date that you were JUST SEX.
She dated all wrong. Instead of playing the game where she made her ex prove that he changed-- take her out, spoil her, kiss her ass while also making the other guy continue to take her out and earn something real... she felt guilty and fucked a wolf in sheep's clothing.
Dating isn't a straight line these days; this isn't 1978. Date = Then Go Together = Then Get Married. You're using old-school methods in modern-war and it's leading to heartbreak time and time again.
LADIES: You are a free agent. There is no "exclusive" while we figure it out. There are no "girlfriend benefits" while he's still referring to you as "my friend," and there's no turning down other men because you hope the one you really like will eventually pick you! Dating like that is insane and insulting.
You're too old to confuse attention with intention. Jokes, sexual chemistry, and texting you every day aren't courting; it isn't impressive; it isn't special treatment. So why do you allow men who bring ordinary energy into your life to skip the line? These Walking Red Flags win because you don't have anyone else on your roster half as cute or funny, so you settle. You don't believe you can do better. So you accept what's in front of you.
Once these men realize they don't have competition and the energy shifts to you needing him more than he needs you, it's a wrap. Your feelings are tied to a man who isn't actually YOUR man. Now you're in panic mode, hoping that he wants something deeper. Are you slow?
Why are you having raw sex with a man who doesn't want you? Why are you turning down dates to sit in the face of a man who no longer wants to go anywhere with you because he already milked the cow? Why are you holding on to a guy who is still dating other women?
Males understand that SINGLE is SINGLE. Men don't feel guilty because they're not in a committed relationship. But men also recognize that women don't like dating around. He doesn't have to tell you "only deal with me" because it's in your DNA to be loyal to something that isn't YOURS.
How To Date Smarter Not Harder
Think about The Male Power Dynamic. Males are taught at an EARLY AGE that a woman will put up with whatever you throw at her if she has no one else to fall back on. Insecure girls hate being alone; they need to feel loved... even if it's not true love. Handsome guys, average guys, even ugly ones, are quick to remind a girl that there are other fish in the sea and that there is nothing about her that can’t be replaced by next week.
Why does this work? Because dating feels like a struggle. You have to meet someone who vibes with you. Trust them. Then hope they feel the same way. Be vulnerable, put yourself out there, and know there is a high chance you'll be rejected. That shit is scary! You're not "tired"; you're horrified.
So when you finally meet a guy, and you click, feel seen, and feel safe, you don't want to let go of that potential. You don't want to keep swiping; you don't want to keep chit-chatting with new guys, and you don't want to give your number out to some stranger. You're betting that dating this ONE MAN will work out and that you will be out of the dating stage soon.
Most of the time, it doesn't work out. You end up single, or worse, you end up in a situationship with a man who doesn't actually want to commit, but wants to keep using you for the girlfriend benefits. In your heart, you know, "I deserve more," but you don't want to walk away and start meeting new people again.
So, the moment this kind of man tells you that you won't do better, or one of your basic-ass friends says, "The grass isn't always greener; just stay with him," your anxiety ramps up, and your brain tells you: I can't lose him. I don't want to start over. I need him.
Spoiler, the grass is greener, as a matter of fact, the shit is neon green compared to what you're attracting.
Men play the single game as it's meant to be. You have to take a page from their book and realize you're not lying, manipulating, or being sneaky by keeping your options open. The only way to win is to be the trophy who gets constant, consistent effort, not the girl who's "too tired" to play the field.
Are You A Trophy or A Raffle Ticket?
As a woman, do you NEED a man to be happy? Not at all. But if you're out here open to love, you have to be logical: The man you choose to marry, have children with, or give your heart to is the most important choice you will make for your future, as you're tying yourself and your bloodline to this man. You need someone who is more than just "tall with a nice smile", you need a WINNER.
-Who has time to date all those men? If you don't shut your silly ass up. I don't want to hear about not having time to date. You have time to play on the internet all day, experiment with a zillion different makeup products, and stalk IG stories. I'm sure you can find 2 hours out of the week to slide into a DM, swipe on an app, and finesse two dinner dates for the weekend. It's not about time, it's about fear. You don't date around because you're afraid that a man (who isn't even your man yet) won't like that.
What will they say? What will they think? Do I have to tell them I talk to other people? What the fuck is wrong with you? Why are you so scared of what men you aren't committed to think?
Competition breeds better results, always! Men don't want you dating other guys because they want an easy road, but the moment they find out that they're not your only choice that jealousy turns into a fire to lock you down. Women who get fast commitments have multiple guys interested. What do you have? That one fuck boy who wants to house date you because he knows you have ALL your eggs in his BASKET. Wake up, ladies! I'm here to teach you how to secure the best man, not just any man, but it starts with following the rules I'm about to lay down...
Stop Focusing On His Potential
The biggest mistake you can ever make is to take yourself off the market for the potential of a man that you don’t even know. I read a study that said women feel empowered by speed dating because of the free choice. You're not a slave, and you don't need to pay for something you can do yourself each weekend.
Fellas go fishing with the mindset to catch as many as possible; they don’t get overexcited at the first bite or stop after reeling ONE in. We men serial date and juggle women until we find one worth focusing on. Far too many exceptional ladies live by this idea that the right one is simply the next one who taps her on the shoulder.
Women refuse to serial date and have been brainwashed to think of it as a dirty thing. Some girls will even turn down a phone number just because they have a first date coming up and want to wait to see how that goes. That stupid shit is like turning down 10 G’s on the spot because you have a lottery scratch-off waiting at home that you have a good feeling about.
Someone once told me, “I’m not the kind of girl that talks to a lot of dudes.” I assume that made her the type of girl who waits by her phone for that ONE boy to hit her up, panics when he doesn’t, and spends all her free time wondering what that ONE boy is doing. Once that ONE boy becomes corny and turns her off, hits it and quits it, or simply vanishes with no excuse, she now becomes the kind of girl that will complain about the time wasted and lament, “It’s so hard to find someone.” No shit! It’s very hard when you focus all of your attention on one person who hasn’t even earned that undivided attention!
You're passing up opportunity after opportunity to get to know other people because you want to see what MAY happen with someone you've been texting or someone you went on a few dates with. Stop acting like you're engaged the moment you get attention from a person you like, because odds are they aren't going to work out! You're single, act single!
If you want a job, you interview with different companies. If you’re desperate, you take any job that can pay the bills. When you want a boyfriend, you talk to different guys unless you’re just desperate; then you settle for any man who pays you attention.
Read that again, and this time think about your own dating habits: are you trying to get the best or just what’s available? Going on two dates and getting morning texts doesn’t prove shit except that he can type and keep an appointment.
Just because you like him and you have things in common, doesn’t mean it’s a sign from god. He could be the one, or he could be just another one. You can’t worry about the future; all you can do is live in the now, and the now mandates that he’s nobody special. While he’s trying to prove that he’s somebody special, you have to continue to go out and do you.
How To Juggle Multiple Guys Without Getting Caught
Spartan Homework: Next month, build your roster foundation by going on 3 dates every two weeks. "But G.L., it's hard for me to meet guys in my city." Stop with the negative thinking. It doesn't matter if you're a woman who can't get dates often or if you're picky; I'm going to let you in on a secret on how to transform your dating life overnight.
Step 1: How To Bring More Men Into Your Dating Life By The End of The Week.
Let's start by working your manifestation magic. To get higher-quality dates, you have to
