If a girl could ask one question it would be this: Why Do Guys Play So Many Games? That’s all they want to know, not the meaning of life, is there a god, Did Mickie Rourke die at the end of the Wrestler? They don’t care about any of that shit. They want to know why niggas play with their emotions. What do we get out of it? Why do we have to lie and cheat? What’s the point of you doing that and this and so on and so forth? We play so many games because girls let us. You keep giving me quarters; I’m going to keep putting them into that arcade. We act that way because Women have a high threshold for bullshit. Suck your teeth, threaten to fuck that lightskin nigga who works at your job, delete our number from your phone—go ahead! And the Academy Award goes to… Your Ass! You’re not going anywhere, you’re not fucking anyone, and even if you delete his number you know it by heart, so when that number pops up you answer in your cute sexy voice like “…hello”. So the Question shouldn’t be Why Do Guys Play Games, its Is His Dick Really that Good?
 
If you text him several times and he doesn’t respond—he’s not ignoring your text messages, he wants to see how psychotic you’re going to make yourself look. He’ll save all 31 of the messages and show his boys how you went from crazed (I KNOW YOU GETTING MY TEXT I’M GOING TO CUT YOUR DICK OFF) to jealous (IT’S YA EX AIN’T IT? YOU DON’T GOTTA LIE) to apologetic (u knw I luv u bay, just text me, I don’t mean to get this way) – Is The Dick That Good?
 
If he tells you you’re going out then doesn’t show up—he’s not being rude, he’s being smart. If you haven’t fucked a girl you have no problems taking her anywhere she wants to go, niggas will trick on Atlantic City trips for untouched coochie, but that same nigga will not take a bitch to AMC Cinema 7 at matinee price if he’s already ran up in it. Why should he? If you’ve given up the vag without him ever taking you out, you’ve established parameters for your relationship—“You have the right to fuck for free” there’s no taking that decree back. So now you have to get another Boo just to take you on dates that the one you’re really feeling won’t—Is The Dick That Good?
 
You ask to borrow a few dollars, you never ask him for anything. Shouldn’t be a problem right? Hell yeah, real niggas don’t loan money, at least that’s how broke niggas rationalize not giving you shit. So you got a dude that comes over, smashes, and won’t even have your back when that rent’s short—Is The Dick That Good?
 
He doesn’t get along with your family, he’s up in your mother’s crib, fucking you while she’s in the next room, wiping his jizz on her favorite hand towels, and calling your little brother a homo. Are you really going to let him say “fuck this house” to your Mom’s? Are you going to have this nigga’s back and say something dumb like “Ma, you started with him first”? – Is The Dick That Good?
 
Define a relationship. Going out for two months, him not calling you for the last month of that “relationship” and then telling your friends “he just going through something and needs space? Bitch I don’t know if you realized this, but he’s no longer your boyfriend. He’s not even an acquaintance. But you still text and call him everyday hoping that today will be the day he answers – Is The Dick That Good?
 
Your daughter has been at her Grandmother’s house for four days. Not because you don’t want her home with you, but because Raynard and Lil Vince want to use your living room as X-box and blunt wrapper central. You justify him kicking your child out of your house by saying “He respect my child, cus he don’t want her around all of that smoke” – Is The Dick That Good?
Your boo is trying to fuck your homegirl. You see them flirting and you could have swore you saw his hand on her thigh when yall went out to Chilli’s the other night. She comes to you and says “Girl, he tried to kiss me”. You cancel that hoe, tell her she’s jealous, and how you’ve noticed the way she’s been throwing the pussy at him. Friendship over. – Is The Dick That Good?
You’re giving him the type of blowjob that would make your mother disown you. He whispers “Put your finger in” …in what? “In my booty”. You do it. Not because you want to, but because he asked. You try and convince yourself, He’s not gay he just like’s a nice finger in the ass… that’s normal. —Is The Dick That Good?
 
He’s out of work; he’s on hard times, so you let him hold a few dollars because you’re confident that if you were in his situation he’d do the same thing. He’s a good dude, just going through some things. The next week he’s fly as fuck, and isn’t calling you like he use to, you hear that he was in the mall with some chick. No way this nigga went and got fresh with your money so he could pull other bitches. He wouldn’t do that to you, he loves you – Is The Dick That Good?
 
He tells you he wants to marry you. No ring, no bended knee, just you two sitting in bed, his cum still on your belly. You start calling him your fiancé. –Is The Dick That Good?
 
Say this nigga is breaking you off with money, taking care of all your shallow ass needs, so what if he’s a hustler. You got his back because D-Boys need love too. His connect is over charging, he needs you to drive something out of state. Just tape it to your ass like a booty pop, and hit that I-95. He would do it himself—really he would, but he um, got to do something for his mother that day. You take that package down south because you two are a team –Is The Dick That Good?
 
You’re a Grown Ass Woman in the street fighting with another Grown Ass Woman. We don’t need to ask what for… We ask – Is The Dick That Good?
 
You’re going through something; you need him there to comfort you. He comes over wanting to fuck. You call him selfish, and ask what he’s ever done for you? He goes to leave, you throw things, and he pops you in the mouth one good time. You cry, he holds you in his arms. It may not have been how you pictured him being there for you, but he’s got his hand around you and telling you he loves you. So what if all you had to do is take a fist to the kisser, that shit will heal. – Is The Dick That Good?
 
I don’t know the answer; I’m not a girl who’s been Dicknotized. But if you showed a logical person a hundred examples of this kind of shit they would surely say “No way The Dick Could Be THAT Good…” But obviously it is, because girls have and will continue to put up with all sorts of shit that they shouldn’t. At the end of the day they’ll just blame it on the fact that niggas ain’t shit and ask “Why Do Guys Play So Many Games”. 
 
Even a four year old knows that if you really want the game to stop for good, you don’t hit reset—you turn the power off.

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