I’m the type of girl who only attracts liars and clowns.
I’m the type of girl who only attracts guys with girlfriends.
I’m the type of girl who only attracts guys who don’t want to commit.
I’m the type of girl who only attracts men who are damaged.
I’m the type of girl who only attracts crazy or jealous men.
You’re annoyed by the kinds of men who shoot their shot at you. But the men that TRY to get you aren’t the problem. The men that DO get you are. Be upset all you want with the level of men who keep knocking at your door, but you need to have that same energy and be upset with yourself for opening the fucking door in the first place to the same types of men over and over again. “I give up on men, none of them are hitting like that, they’re all trash.” Okay, statistically speaking that’s impossible. So are you done being a brat? Cool. Then let’s look at what’s really going on in your universe.
The Law of attraction isn’t like applying for a job. There is no effort, no hoops to jump through, no squeezing your eyes shut and wishing real real hard. It happens with no free will required. When your subconscious mind and conscious mind are in alignment, you become a magnet for whatever experience you feel you deserve–positive or negative. Just like the law of universal gravitation keeps your feet pinned to the ground, the law of attraction keeps pulling people into your life based on what’s going on with you internally. This isn’t about punishments, karma, or star positions, it’s simple. Your mind pumps millions of thoughts a day, negative or positive, confident or fearful, determined or defeated. Your mind creates a world based on your most dominant thoughts and a pattern slowly forms. So what does your pattern say about your life? Currently? Are you winning or losing? Are you confident or insecure? Other people aren’t determining your happiness or success, you are.
You no longer want a Future, you want your Russell. You no longer want to be the girl that walks through the club and a guy tries to palm her ass, you want to attract men who have respect for you. You know longer want the excitement that comes with a cocky guy that lives fast, you want to actually sit around and do boring ass things with someone who is stable. As you grow and mature, the young shit you used to like doesn’t impress you, you want a new dating pool not the same old bullshit. So what’s stopping you? You are. The hustle that these LOA books try to teach you is that you can just think positively and change over night. Nah. It took weeks, months, even years for your dominant thoughts to become dominant, and it’ll take that long to reverse course depending on what’s going on subconsciously. Before we get into the men you’re attracting let’s start with the easier example of money.
You say you want more money, but your thoughts tell you that it’s hard to earn more money than what you’re used to getting weekly. You see things going on in the external world that prove that money is hard to make for everyone not just you. You become content with this world you’ve created and except the rule that money comes and goes and there’s never enough. The pattern then becomes that all the money you attract disappears as soon as you make it, and that’s just how it is until you get lucky. The irony is that when you hack your mind, hope, pray, and focus on something you really want to buy or do, without rhyme or reason, you come into money you weren’t expecting. You call this a miracle, random, or god working in mysterious ways. You spend that money on whatever it is you needed it for, and go back to normal. Your brain doesn’t put the pieces together that it wasn’t an external force or magical powers looking out for you, it was a universal law. You attracted wealth in a moment of desperation, you broke from your pattern to allow for abundance. Then just as soon as it happened, you’re back to calling it a fluke because you don’t understand alignment.
When you use words like “miracle” or “angels” or “luck”. You give power to superstition and mystery. When your entire world is built on a foundation of Hail Mary prayers or lucky breaks, you never become a master of your fate. You become a master of reacting when your back is against the wall, not a proactive creator of circumstances and good fortune. A person that looks at their bank account and it’s low, dwindling weekly, or overdrawn, that feeling of being poor or losing money vibrates stronger than lying to yourself about “I’m going to be rich one day”. Your alignment isn’t off, it’s on, but it’s set in the wrong direction. Your delusion is that you will make it, but your dominant thoughts, the ones that are aligned and ruling your life, tell you that things will never change.
Think about this negative mindset in terms of dating. Your pattern is that you always attract someone who doesn’t want you the way you want them or you attract those that you aren’t into as much as they’re into you. Make a wish for someone different, really focus on breaking the pattern and getting someone worthwhile but who isn’t an asshole. What happens? You meet that person who is different, but your negative thoughts yell, “It’s not going to work out, he’s hiding something, this is too good to be true…” and this man who you attracted and the relationship you were about to build crumbles under the weight of your own paranoia.
You say you hate your results, but what are you doing to change them. Do you meditate? Do you change your avatar’s appearance? Do you seek out therapy? Most importantly do you know how to stop the current pattern of your thoughts and take control of what you attract? I’ll answer that shit for you. The answer is “no.”
You like dating men that play games with your head, because you want to prove to yourself that you can train a bad boy to treat you good.
You like dating men with girlfriends because you want to prove to yourself that you can compete and win over the next bitch.
You like dating men who hurt your feelings, because deep down you’re a masochist and think you’re not worthy of love.
You like dating men who aren’t physically or financially on your level, because you think that being better than them means they won’t hurt or leave you.
You like dating men and then running away once they get too close, because your abandonment issues refuse to let you drop your guard.
You like dating toxic men, because you’re toxic too.
Show me a list of the last four men you’ve dated, fucked, or have been in a relationship with, and I’ll show you a pattern that proves that it’s not external factors at play, but your internal thoughts that are ruining your ability to connect and become happy.
You were given a limitless mind and instead of flexing your power you’ve chosen to limit yourself. “Where do these women find men that spoil them… Where do these women find men that love them unconditionally… How are these women winning while I’m still struggling?” Get off of their dicks, and look in the mirror. You’re trying to fly with a broken wing. You have daddy or mommy issues you refuse to address. You have trust issues that you are afraid to open up. You have physical hang ups that have lowered your self-esteem. You have attitude problems, jealousy fits, and so much internal anxiety that it is literally impossible for you to ever get out of your own way and allow the kind of love other women receive without effort.
“G.L. why do ugly men always approach me? Why would they even think they had a chance with me?”
Because they do have a chance! Let’s be honest, you all can thirst over various celebrities, but you will eventually date down. It’s not about being bored, it’s about that little inside voice telling you, “Why not? What do you have to lose with this ugly nice guy who actually pays attention to me.”
“G.L. why are these dirty hood dudes always in my DMs, can you take a look and tell me what vibes I’m giving off.”
I don’t need to look at your pictures, I already know that you’re the kind of woman that dates those men. You get off on fighting, you like when a man puts you in place, and your pussy gets the wettest while being choked out after makeup sex. You are inherently ratchet no matter how many stamps you have in your passport and those men can smell someone like you that wants to be thugged out.
This month alone, I’ve received emails from women who have gone back to exes because they don’t think they can do better. A woman who thinks her boyfriend is disgusting and overweight, but agreed to his proposal because she doesn’t think she can do better. A woman who didn’t even date girls a year ago, who is now settling for a lesbian relationship because she doesn’t think there is a such thing as a good man. A woman who keeps getting cheated on is asking me if it’s worth staying because he’s an athlete who helps her out with bills. So many beautiful women who attract ugly situations because they have one thing in common, they do no BELIEVE they are good enough to do anything but settle or be exploited.
If you’re in this category, keep reading, as I’m going to show you the following things: How to hit reset and how to change your results.
Think of your heart as an apartment complex and each man you date or enter into a relationship with as someone looking to move in. A man who looks good can get inside the building, he may be able to get on the elevator, and if he’s special he can gain entry inside of your apartment. If this man goes above and beyond he may even be able to spend the night. But it takes extraordinary effort to be able to move in…aka win your heart. Or so you would think. There are so many women who let strangers inside their homes because their locks are broken.
YOU determine the type of man you unlock that door for, so do you blame the man who keeps knocking, or do you blame yourself for peeking out and hearing what he has to say? The real problem is that some of you don’t have many dudes knocking at that door, so you buy into the bullshit from the few guys that do come banging and allow them easy access when common sense is telling you to reinforce the locks and let his bitch ass bang until he gets the hint. So why are your locks broken?
Why do men who have no business being with you get so far? There’s not such thing as slipping on a dick, slipping into a relationship, or slipping into real feelings. You complain about a lack of options but you are guilty of opening and reopening the door for men you claim to be trash. “G.L. you know men lie, that’s why I give them chances.” C’mon. So many of those dudes who talk themselves into your life don’t have to sell themselves with crazy lies. These dudes tell you straight up that they have a baby mama they live with, aren’t employed, or will admit they’re not looking for anything serious from you. You have fucking eyes, you can see that he’s moving funny, he talks a certain way, or that his words don’t match his actions. So why do you say “yes” to a date and then another date and then to sex and then more sex? You not only picked wrong once, you keep choosing to deal with these men even after they show their true colors.
He’s told you who he is or showed you who he is, so don’t use “men lie” as an excuse because women are smarter than men. The truth is, you want to take a chance, you think the cute guy with three kids is the best you can do or the unattractive guy who likes you more than you like him is the path you have to take to avoid heartbreak again.
You are not defined by the men that ask you out, you are defined by the men who you allow to take you out! You are who you associate with, not who tries to associate with you. The blame game is played out. No one has sexting forced on them at gunpoint, there is no knife held to your throat that makes you become friends with benefits or a side chick or remain entangled for months. If you’re the type of girl who only attracts XYZ, it’s because you consciously allowed yourself to become that type of girl by opening the door for these losers to become a part of your life. Only when you accept that you make bad choices can you break the pattern and start to attract better candidates.
WHAT ARE YOU PROJECTING
Guys who shoot their shot at you, be it in person, online, whatever, they are taking a gamble based on what you’re projecting. A man will make an observation based on the way you look, how you look compared to the women he’s bagged in the past, and then decide if the odds of rejection are low enough to go for it. Ugly guys trying to date you doesn’t mean you’re ugly, it could be that he had a history with a girl who looked like you, so that tells him that you may be into him the same way she was because he brings other beyond looks to the table. Guys who have girlfriends may look at the way you switch, and it sends sex waves to his brain, suddenly he’s made up his mind to approach you because the way your ass jiggle reminds him of the last chick he had as a sidepiece. The point is, these men DO NOT KNOW YOU, they are making an educated guess that you may be into them based on their own life experiences.
Everyone in this world stereotypes, that’s how you make quick decisions. A rich white man may see a black woman with a big ass and think of it as ghetto and not talk to her, she could be prettier than every other woman in the room face wise, but that ass makes him uncomfortable. However, if you take that same black woman and switch out a huge ass for huge boobs, he’ll walk over and shoot his shot because big titties are accepted in all cultures as the right kind of sexy. Physical attraction is easy, you can wear certain things to enhance or downplay your body or face. This alone can get you attention from different levels of men. I remember a woman who read Ho Tactics told me she had her closet sorted: Asian men are going to love me in this. White men are going to buy me a drink if I wear this. And then there were outfits she said she avoided because it got attention from young black men who tended to be broke scammers or drug dealers and she had enough of that in high school. She stereotyped just like men stereotype, and it ended up making her money. While not all men go for the same things, it happens enough to predict typical male reactions.
I’ve written about the physical appearance in my books and how to upgrade your Spartan Avatar. So let’s shift to the real layer of attraction. The attitude you’re projecting when someone does start a conversation with you. Do you react to goofy shit, jokes and memes? Do you react to filthy shit, sex talk and explicit photos? Do you react to trick talk, money and promises? No matter how you look or why a man initially came on to you, what draws him in is if you’re showing signs that line up with who he is. If a man sees that you’re shy and silly and will allow him to lead he’s going to keep doing that. If a man sees that you’re broke and get open off of money, he’s going to Ho you out. If a man sees that you’re reacting to sexual talk early, then he’s going to assume that you find him more attractive than you do most men, and he’s going to Dick Tactic the hell out of you.
Can you tell me what kind of woman you are when a man first meets you? No, because you just react, you don’t think or plan, you just flow, and that flow is the truth of your personality. This is why a fake strong woman with an attitude can be broken down like the littler girl she is and why a truly confident woman can run circles around a man who makes the mistake of playing her like she’s basic. The goal isn’t to fake confidence and hope to attract better men, the goal is to work on yourself and become truly confidence so your world becomes a more positive experience across the board!
Can you break down your life like this:
“G.L. I tend to attract men who need mothering because I enjoy helping people. I’m a nurturer because I grew up in a family structure where I had to take care of things that kids don’t normally have to. It matured me, it gave me a sense of power, but it also made me controlling. I bump heads with guys who tend to be alphas and that leads me to go the opposite direction and fall in love with broken men. Guys between jobs, who need constant favors, who can’t do anything for me outside of the bedroom. I say that I don’t mind, but it does. I feel like I’ve been used and undervalued.”
A woman who knows her faults in this way and can pinpoint the real reasons she has the relationships she has, is in the best position to grow.
You can’t change your spots, you can’t go from being independent to dependent, but you can recognize that you need to pick spots to chill and allow others to do for you. You can’t force yourself to be attracted to a square when you like scammers and hustlers, but you can recognize the why of your attraction to those types and begin to unravel it until you can rewire your mind to appreciate a different type of person. Trust me, it works. I’ve helped many women one on one and some took years to finally get it, but when it happened the results were fast and furious. All it takes is a want to understand what’s going on in your head, a need to change for the better, and the discipline to do the opposite of what you are used to do in terms of dating.
Your mind will attack you when you try to force change. The more you try to go against the pattern the more the pattern will defend itself. To take this from the metaphysical to the practical, the moment you try to become a new woman, you will have men testing you and tempting you to remain the same. Men don’t mind being persistence because we understand that women crack under pressure. Persistence is better than lying when it comes to getting pussy. For example let’s say you’re not going to date guys like Asshole Jason who always wants to argue, guilt you, and is rarely consistent even though he claims he loves you. A week later you meet someone who gives you new guy vibes, seems totally different from Jason, but after a few dates he starts to show signs that he’s similar to Asshole Jason. You try to push him away or even ghost him but he’s persistent, swearing he’s different. Now your mind is telling you, “just see what he’s about, this effort is proof that he’s different” and go against your intuition, only to fall in deep with a guy who showed you bright red flags. A month later and you’re crying because this guy is worse than Jason, but you like him and don’t want to lose him. You just repeated your mistake, beloved. Why? You failed to weather the storm. The law of attraction gave you what you still wanted, you never wanted better than Jason, you just didn’t want Jason, so it gave you Asshole Alex who was Jason adjacent. See how the mind works when you’re weak and undisciplined?
Working on self, means working on self. I want you to be able to break down your character the way I wrote above, but know that you can’t just hide out while you do the work. Men will keep trying you while you attempt to work on yourself. You can tell him that you have a boyfriend, aren’t dating, or just want to be friends, but if your actions are saying, “But I’ll still get to know you romantically” then why the fuck would he listen to the words coming out of your mouth about him not being your type? He may be a clown, but he got your number after the fourth time he asked… he got you to go over his crib after begging for a month… he ate your box six times before you fucked him… Yeah he had to work for it, but in the end, he got exactly what he wanted from you while you got quality time and dick from a guy you don’t really like. He spent time with you, got to know you, got to taste you, got to fuck, and even though it took months instead of weeks, the result was the same—HE WON.
You on the other hand, didn’t want to give him your number because he wasn’t your type—but you did. Didn’t want to go out with him, but you were bored—so you did. Didn’t want him to touch you, but fuck you look like turning down some head—so you gave in. You were supposed to take a break, understand yourself, but you ended up right back in the dating came. No one forced this on you. You did it to yourself, princess.
Some of you have friends or family members that never addressed their issues and married guys they didn’t like at first, and you may think, “awww see people grow on each other,” Don’t aww at that settle shit, that’s not cute, that’s tragic. If she had to manufacture compatibility because she was hard up for a ring, that shit’s worse than being single. You have to step back from dating, reset the pattern, and allow the law of attraction to give you something new. If you rush that process, you will keep getting different but similar. So you can’t say “there’s no men out here”. There’s no out there out there, princess. It’s all in your head. And until you collapse the wave and truly create a different reality for yourself, you’ll either keep being alone or keep settling.
A Single Thought
What do you really want out of a relationship? “Someone nice, loyal, attractive, financially stable, good sex,” let me stop you because that’s the wrong question that’s going to lead to more bullshit fantasy talk. What do you deserve in a relationship?
You deserve it all. You will get it all. The perfect man for you does exist. You two will set the world on fire.
Say that right now. It’s easy to repeat, but it’s hard to believe until you actually do the internal work. When I talk about a man that’s perfect for you maybe your thoughts go to a man you broke up with, a guy who left you, or even one who died and you fall into the trap of “I missed my chance.” That thought keeps you stuck in the negative loop of settling.
Perhaps your mind goes to the men who have done you wrong for no reason. You think about how you’re a great woman, but these men have used you, cheated on you, wasted your time, and ruined your optimism. Again, if you lean into this idea that there are no good men, you continue in this loop of resentment.
No affirmations can survive when your mind is calling bullshit based on your past hang ups. You have to change that bitter, toxic, stubborn mentality. Right now there are basic bitches who are quick to say love doesn’t exist and then when someone gets married they say it’s luck. Who are you? Are you the Basica that doesn’t see herself winning, sees this world as depressing or are you a fucking Spartan who sees this as world for your taking? Break the pattern. Get to the root of your trauma, unwrap yourself from this blanket of misery, and understand that the law of attraction is always at work. You’re going to get what you want, every time. So will that be more pain and drama or will it be happiness? Fuck positive thinking, you must burn down the past and be reborn a Spartan whose life is that of power and abundance…