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While I recuperated today from a fucked up week of being sick, I read some emails from some readers that made me think about a touchy subject. Two different girls sent similar queries about women who cheat with other girl’s men from the perspective of the other woman and it made me think of a debate I had with a friend about Alicia Keys. I love Alicia Keys, I could care less about her music, but as a woman who saw what she wanted, went out and took it, I applaud her. The reason no one jumped on Alicia for being a pimple faced home wrecker is because Mashonda was a nobody. Alicia was the homegirl they grew up with; of course you side with your homegirl over some equally high yella R&B bitch with no hits. For thousands of other women Alicia represented something other than the trifling bestie, she was them. The side chick who actually won.

We all make jokes about sideline hoes. Sideline hoes are dumb. Sideline hoes are in denial, yadda fucking yadda. But the truth of the matter is that the sideline hoe is rarely any of these things. Let’s not confuse the mistress with the jumpoff.

The jumpoff is the simple hoe who you call after hours. You do not take her out to eat; you do not have deep conversations, and you never trick a dime on her. The Jumpoff may not even know you have a girl. You know nothing about the jumpoff except what time she gets off work and how deep your penis can go into her throat before her eyes begin to water. The Jumpoff is about sex. Nothing more, nothing less.

The Side Chick knows about your relationship, and because of this knowledge you can’t treat her like shit and expect not to be hit where it hurts. She’s not a thing, she wants to spend time with you, talk, laugh, etc… she’s like the homegirl but with benefits.
If you’re a guy, it’s nothing to be attracted to another chick, or crush on another chick, but to take it to that next level is serious. If you go into an affair with a woman and you have the decency to lay everything ou...

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