Think about the simplicity of a romantic relationship for a minute. If you cut out all the bullshit, it’s essentially two people meet, they make their attraction known, they get to know one another, and then decide if they’re compatible enough to take it to the next level. If the, “I really like you,” is mutual they enter into a monogamous relationship. If neither one of these people feel they are a match, or if one doesn’t feel as much of a connection, they part ways. Repeat until you find the right one. That shit sounds simple, but when you take away the ability to honestly communicate because you fear keeping it real will make you seem like an asshole, ruin your shot at sex, or lead to an ego bruising rejection, relationships become stressful and complex. Instead of, “This works. This doesn’t work,” you’re stuck trying to force it to work for the sake of your ego or on a mission to get that other person to see that you don’t want it to work without hurting their feelings.

Women talk to guys who they don’t think are cute and get ugly dick trapped all day every day because they refuse to communicate honestly. I guarantee that the majority of women reading this has talked to, gone with, or fucked a guy who they initially wanted nothing to do with. Why do ugly guys keep getting at me, do they think I’m just as ugly? You’re not ugly; but they do think you’re desperate. A guy like this knows that 8 out of 10 girls date down, and odds are you’re one of them. This goes for intelligence and finances as well. Women who toot their horn that they are out of certain nigga’s league will actually go down to the minor’s and give him a shot if her only other options consist of fucking her vibrator or fucking her ex-boyfriend. The inability to communicate, “yes I’m shallow, and no I don’t want you calling me because I would never be happy reproducing with you no matter how nice you are,” is seen as mean and basic bitches throughout history have preached, “one option is better than no options.” Save that shit for the second placers, Spartans create options that always lead to getting whatever they desire, and if some lame gets his feelings hurt because you’re being honest, oh well, he shouldn’t have been so damn sensitive.

Non-communicative women also play the, “don’t ask don’t tell” game where they ASSUME dudes want them in a girlfriend fashion because they get emoji texts in the morning and their pussy ate for 4 ½ minutes at night. Just like settling for “not my type,” refusing to open your mouth can lead you to settle for “my type… but I share that pipe,” instead of getting both the man and situation you want. We men live by the motto, “if she wants to assume she’s my girlfriend, then let the bitch assume that in her head. Out here in the real world, I’m doing me.” I go deep into every angle of this on the female side of things in Solving Single (read and you will learn how to cut through EVERY mixed signal and you will have ZERO communication problems), so let me shift to the fellas for the rest of this. You fools are guilty of being He-Man in your heads, but stay keeping your mouth closed like little bitches when you’re face to face with a girl, which creates headaches that you should be old enough to avoid. Walter White lies to keep his empire afloat, you lie to get ratchet pussy… it’s not that serious, homie. No matter if you’re after sex or serious romance, these are 5 things you can’t shy away from.

Five Things You Can’t Be Afraid To Say To A Woman

5) I Like You Like That: You’re mad cool. I’m feeling you, Ma. I’m loving you today. Just called to check up on my homie. Nigga, pull your skirt down because you’re vagina is glistening in this light. If you like a girl, I don’t care if it’s after a day of talking to her, tell her straight up that you like her like that! 21^st century ol’ bashful ass males are quick to talk nasty but they aren’t brave enough to say meaningful things. So many girls are confused and come at me with, “I think he likes me… but I really don’t know.” I can’t slap her hand but so hard when you as a man are being an emotional ninja because you fear coming off thirsty. If you got her number and you call her or text her every day, you ASSUME that she knows you like her in more than a platonic way. If you flirt that her box probably tastes like strawberry gelato, you ASSUME she realizes that she’s not in the friend zone. Guessing is for game show contestants, real men know what they want and show what they want! A Woman doesn’t always get the hint that you’re serious about her or trust in those hints because for every one guy who does those things you do or says those things you say out of genuine interest, there are five who hit her up in the same manner just to accelerate the path to the pussy. If you see her as just Pussy, do your thing and gas her up with your aloof sweet talk. Those girls who can’t see past basic ass kissing will always let you bust that open. However, when it comes to these real women and not these little ass girls, you have to give them more. A smiley face at the end of the text won’t impress her like it does a basic bitch, and letting her order a blooming onion from Outback Steakhouse won’t prove you’re affection the same way that simple shit convinces a ratchet girl of your feelings.

Not opening up and being elusive works on girls who don’t have dudes knocking on the door, ladies who have options require a different approach. You know you’re that dude, so throw caution to the wind and show her that this isn’t a wait and see type situation. Admit you’re impressed, tell her that you’re going to lock that down, and tease that there isn’t shit she can do to stop it. Turn her on with that confidence and make your intentions clear! The reason a lot of you guys aren’t getting the girls you really like and settling for cheap and easy pussy is because you’re afraid to lay your feelings on the line. Playing it too cool will drive her into the arms of a dude who’s transparent and willing to be decisive about his want for a real connection. Telling a girl you like her is scary, if she doesn’t feel the same way you’re going to feel stupid, but beating around the bush is a bigger waste of time. A girl who doesn’t like you like that on Thursday won’t like you like that come Saturday, so put your cards on the table early and often. You’re too old to be dating in riddles, keep that shit real, and have confidence that you will always get what you want.

4) You belong To Me: You know like I know like he knows, that once you lay eyes on a bad chick your penis falls in love, that’s usually a false alarm that subsides after you smash. After you spend time with a chick who actually talks as if she has sense, isn’t jealous, doesn’t annoy you, and makes you actually work for shit instead of just rolling over like a weak bitch, then that’s a real alarm. You go from wanting to fuck to wanting to cuff. This also makes you nervous because you’re putting your heart in this woman’s hand, but she’s worth it so you take that leap. Most dudes are smart enough to cash in that lottery ticket instead of walking around with that joint in their pocket, but there are some new niggas who leave that ticket in their pocket, and then break down in tears once they go to check for it and it’s gone. You can’t play around, my G. A girl that impresses you on nearly every level will impress the next guy just as easily, you know this, so what the fuck are you waiting for? I realize that there are women who will wait in your pocket and stay there because they don’t realize their pussy is the Powerball and their personality is the Mega Millions.

If you can get a chick to accept that placeholder position, salute– you’re winning, kid. However, if that woman ever falls into some sense or gets a link to BGAE and realizes what’s going on, you’re fucked. Instead of calling girls who date other dudes at the same time hoes or guilt tripping chicks into waiting on you to be ready for something serious, how about you man up and do what any nigga with a brain would do—Lock her down. Telling a woman you want her to be yours exclusively is mandatory to avoid confusion, rivalry, and resentment. I’ve noticed the new way to do things is to play the reverse psychology game where you say, “We’re not exclusive, but you’re the only one I’m seeing…” That Kurt Russell/Goldie Hawn Common Law Marriage shit doesn’t apply here, son. Not every girl is dumb enough to be exclusive without a title and let you keep an invisible leash around her neck while you figure your bullshit out. A woman who isn’t content, even a weak one, is one chance meeting with a real nigga from giving that pretend-exclusive coochie away. Next thing you know you’re arguing because you thought that imaginary contract was real, and while you say you forgive her because you aren’t technically together, your relationship is ruined because you will never EVER be able to trust her again. Avoid all of this nonsense by snatching up what you want the moment you decide you want it.

3) I Don’t Like You Like That: The negative side of being honest is just as scary as the positive side. For a long time, dudes have gotten away with playing nice and hoping that those girls had enough common sense to get the hint. Losing cellphones, working too much, busy with schoolwork, those lies can get the job done, but it still leaves the door open when you should have slammed it shut. My nigga, you know damn well that if a lonely Friday night comes up and that chick who you’re not feeling texts you or calls, you may just entertain her for kicks or phone sex. If you see her out and you’re turned up you may even end up having sex with her knowing you can’t stomach her existence. All that does is restart the relationship that she thinks she has with you, and mandates that you now come up with a new excuse to get rid of her lovesick ass. We’re all adults, which means saying, “no thanks” does not have to be hateful or rude. You don’t need to tell her she doesn’t look like the type of girls you beat off to or that her personality is drier than the food she posts on Instagram. Let her down the same way you would want a woman to let you down. All this, “we can still be cool” shit is pointless. Why the fuck do you want to be her friend? Convenient sex? You’re going to pay for that pussy in stress every time you have to come up with lies about why you keep ignoring her calls. Maybe you want to get access to her sexy homegirls. Go to her Facebook and add those hoes, you don’t need to keep her around under some false friendship banner knowing damn well she’s in like with you. When you let a girl you don’t really fuck with hang around it keeps her hoping. If she has no shot, keep it 300, and tell her it’s not going to work. You don’t need to explain the reasons, or offer her a consolation prize of coming over to fuck one last time. Clean breaks, are the best breaks.

2) I’m Fucking Other Girls: For the zillionth time, there is nothing wrong with having a fuck buddy if you’re mentally mature enough to handle it. Most men will end up having more fuck buddy relationships than authentic girlfriends because there are so many women willing to just fuck that you don’t have to commit for sex anymore. You do yourself a disservice and make things way more complicated by lying about things you don’t need to with a girl who just wants dick. If shorty with the nice ass isn’t your type outside of the shape of that ass and her attitude is kind of clingy, no way you make her your girl, but you are attracted to her so you hit it. Nothing wrong with that, she’s giving it up so she wants you sexually as well, it’s a win-win. The problem comes when you start being dishonest and overly affectionate. Don’t start saying shit you know will fuck with her brain like how cool she is, how under different circumstances you’d be with her, or that she’s the only one you’re seeing. I know like you know like he knows, that you are just putting icing on the cake so you can keep fucking this girl who you don’t think measures up. Here’s the secret fellas, being honest will not cut off the pussy supply. Women like to fuck too, and maybe you aren’t her type either, but by laying on compliments, you take it to the next level and feelings start to form. “It’s just sex,” will turn into her really liking you not due to her being thirsty for love, but because you were pillow talking her ear off instead of just beating up the pussy and calling her the next time you wanted a shot. Being a fuck buddy is a form of friendship, but it’s also a professional agreement, and you can’t start blurring the lines.

Before there is any confusion, lay down the law that you’re still fucking other girls, I don’t care if you’re not fucking other women now, you will want to and you plan to, or else you would be actively courting this girl like a girlfriend, not just vacationing in her vagina. By saying your dick’s a free agent, before true feelings have formed, you keep her from acting out and expecting something more. At the same time, you keep your mind guilt free. Why would a man lie to a bitch he’s just fucking? A jumpoff shouldn’t be important enough to even deserve an explanation, but so many men have been breed to fear honesty. These men are afraid to ruin the convenience of easy sex, but real G’s know that if you fuck her right and treat her with respect when you’re with her, she’s not going anywhere. Stop being a coward, be up front, and watch how stress free your FWB situation is once you don’t have to lie about who you’re texting or the reason you can’t come over. It’s just sex, stop making it into more by pretending you actually like her like a girlfriend!

1) Don’t Call Me: Dudes don’t know how to break up… it’s usually a verbal break followed by continuing to be her boyfriend while being on that break. This shit has gotten really messy over the last few years, as being an ex-boyfriend has become the latest “exclusive but not committed” hustle. I don’t think it’s a case of men wanting to downgrade the chick while keeping their hands in the cookie jar, but more of an inability to really let go. Girlfriends are difficult, unlike FWB or girls you didn’t like, you can’t drift away and let them get the hint. Any woman who has been with you on that level knows your tricks and even when you try to vanish, she has a way of pulling you back in. The same way I tell women to follow their head and not their heart, you have to be strong enough to hit the Heisman on a girl who doesn’t benefit you emotionally. Good communication is always decisive, it leaves no room for interpretation, nor will it ever create confusion. When breaking up with a girl you no longer want to be with, you can yell, curse, say her pussy was wack, but she knows like I know like you know, that it’s all raw emotion, the passion of the moment, and in a week you two will be back together because you’re both hooked. Instead of being dramatic, keep that shit as simple as an Ikea TV stand manual. If she calls you, tell her not to call. No need for, “bitch, don’t call my phone… fuck you, erase my number… That’s why I’m fucking such and such now…” Being dramatic shows you still have fucks to give. Ikea that shit, and be dry and direct when cutting her out of your life. Do. Not. Call. Me. Hang up. She may call back, if so add, “I’ve asked you not to call me. This relationship is over, have some self-respect and don’t call someone who doesn’t want you.” Now that shit hurts, but it’s mandatory. A woman who thinks the door to come back is slightly cracked will spend the next weeks trying to get you back because she thinks it’s just a phase or that you’re mad. Breaking up like an Ikea manual takes the emotions out of it, and forces her to accept that you aren’t just acting out, you really don’t care to speak to her ever again.

Relationships will always be as complicated as you allow them to be. Teenagers are still finding out who they are and what they want, but by the time you reach adulthood we all know what we want and what we don’t want romantically. Therefore, any person you come across will be revealed as someone you want to sleep with, be with, or punt across the parking lot. It’s a simple experience, but when we hide our true feelings or attempt to change them to make someone else happy, that’s when the lies form and the headaches start pounding. Be true to what you want and get exactly what you want. If you’re attracted to a girl, get her number. If she’s impressive, take off your cool and make your intentions known. If she’s too good to be true, risk that rejection and try to lock her down. If the idea of that person isn’t actually who that person turns out to be, remember relationships aren’t written in tattoo ink, continue to keep it real and tell them it’s not working out. Fellas, the game isn’t actually about spitting game, it’s about making decisive decisions at every step in order to attract exactly what you want. All of this stress about girls you don’t like pressuring for relationships—you did that to yourself. All this sadness due to girls who you really want to be with not responding the way the bust downs respond to your swag—you did that to yourself. The realer you keep it with yourself, the realer life will keep it with you.