Every time I want to focus on Spartanhood and enlightenment I get pulled back by the same old nonsense. I say something about power and a girl nods along then hits me with, “But what do you think he meant by this text…” I write about living a no fucks given lifestyle and a girl co-signs only to chime in with, “But why did he reach out again, does this mean he realizes what he lost?” The point’s down here, but you’re up there in Basica altitude, totally missing everything I’ve trying to imprint into your brain. You are still trying to fit into what a man wants you to be, or trying to crack the code to get someone that doesn’t actually want you to reconsider. You pretend to be strong, you play along as if you understand that you rule this world, but in the end, you’re still stressed over what a man has said or hasn’t said as it relates to how he feels about you. No matter how many times I challenge you to rise above this dick chasing mentality of “please pick me,” your love-starved ass relapses. You’re not worried about becoming a Spartan, you’re worried about getting a boy to like you, getting revenge on a boy that played you, or proving some petty point that will make you feel vindicated after being devalued by a man who didn’t give you closure. “But why do guys always…” is the mating call of a girl that’s going to always get played. Users exploit the same types of women, hence the reason these lames “always” treat you in ways that are confusing to your naive mind. I’m sick of hearing about this, so I don’t care how long it takes your short attention span having ass to read this entire thing, you need to study every line, and actually internalize it. There is no reason any woman reading this right now should still be taking L’s once she’s finished reading it.
Typical women think about typical shit because they vibrate at the lowest level, the beta female wants to be an Alpha Female but at the top of her mind on any given day is: I don’t understand how men think, all I know is that I want the guy I like to like me back without all the confusion. There is no confusion! A man sees you as a girl that will be good for a time or a girl that could be good for life. As an Alpha you don’t sit waiting to be chose, but all betas do is wait under the cover of uncertainty and thirst. You know how it feels when someone likes you, is acting distant, or is cooling off on you. No matter what he’s saying, the feeling you get points you to the truth of the situation, but I’m convinced many of you push that truth away in favor of “but he said I was all he wanted last week, so he must have meant it.” If someone gave you a real versus fake Naïve Test where it listed all the conniving things men say, I wonder how many of you would pass? When your girlfriends or family members are dealing with relationship issues, you have all the answers. When it comes to your own issues, you are so far up that man’s ass that you can’t see how naïve you’re being by taking his word as gospel.

But He Said He Was Looking for Marriage!

Sara’s Story: Before I get into the Naïve Test, I want to tell you about Simple Sara, a girl who I was introduced to a few months ago by her cousin. Sara’s question was this: What Does It Mean When a Man Says He Is Looking for Marriage? Is He Just Saying That? How Do I Know If He’s Serious? Sara had been celibate for two years for some typical ass reason that I can’t remember. She was your normal fear based woman who got hurt, took her coochie and decided not to participate in the game of love. Sara told me about this new man in her life who she met at work after being transferred to a different department. Work Guy hit Sara with some basic bait flirting, the kind where we men ask about the boyfriend we already know you don’t have just so you can confirm that you’re single. “Boyfriend? I don’t have one of those,” *rolls eyes, no shit* A week later they were on their first date. Not just any first date one of those 5-6 hour dates where women think it’s magic just because they talked about a bunch of random things for a long period of time. *spoiler alert, long dates don’t mean shit* Work Guy dropped the bomb that his next girlfriend will need to be auditioning to be his wife. Sara felt the same way; all of her energy should be put into making sure her next boyfriend was husband material, not just another boyfriend. Perfect match, right? Wrong!

My original text sent from Sara’s phone didn’t say anything crazy, all I asked was: What about me doesn’t make me marriage material? It was a Date Like a Spartan type question only meant to give me insight into this guy’s head. In response, the guy sent this long winded admission that Sara was marriage material…but not HIS marriage material. In short, he didn’t really fuck with Sara, knew he didn’t really fuck with Sara, and challenged with having to give an honest answer, he gave a nice response that kept the door open so he could keep fucking Sara. The words he carefully chose didn’t say she was a bad woman, it just said they were not compatible because of where he was in life. See what happened? A man who isn’t into you makes it about his flaws, not your flaws, so that he doesn’t burn the bridge while in the midst of rejecting you. Guys have probably used the same technique on you. Tell you he doesn’t want you in a way where you don’t hate him, which leads to you still being okay with “talking” because let’s face it, you don’t really have any other options.

What Does He Mean When He Says…
What Does It Mean When a Man Says He Wants Something Serious BUT Doesn’t Treat You Seriously? You’re not the one he sees as worth that seriousness. He’s not lying, he’s discriminating. You’re cool, but you’re not “it”. No matter what he says, does, or how good he eats your box and proclaims you bring something out of him that no other girl does, if he doesn’t snatch you up then you must get the hint—he doesn’t want you! But, I know his life, he’s busy, he works a lot, is trying to start a business, has problems at home, his reasons are valid blah blah blah. If you believe that shit then I have a bag of oxygen I want to sell you. Stop failing the naïve test! If he has an excuse about money, lack of time, or any life event that’s keeping him from being with you, then why did he want to date you in the first place? Knowing his life wasn’t ready for a real girlfriend did he see you as a girl that he could just have fun with? Look past the excuses, and the truth will smack you in the fucking face! What he’s really trying to say in the nicest way possible is “I’m not buying, I’m just trying to lease.” This cliché of men not recognizing a good thing until it’s gone is overblown. The vast majority of grown men know a good thing the moment they lay eyes on her or has that first conversation, and if she hits the mark he will move like Barry Allan to lock that down before the next man has the chance. Go ahead roll your eyes, but you know it’s true.

What Does It Mean When a Man Opens Up To Me?
What You Want It to Mean: A guy comes to you and tells you his past trauma, his future dreams, and his current fears. He admits that he acts a certain way because of something he went through, and asks you to stick it out with him while he figures it out. That’s the emotional honesty that gets a pussy wetter than a full beard on a 6’ 5” nigga. You have dealt with men who hold everything in, who shut down when you want to have a real talk, and for this man to be so honest without having to argue, fuss, or give ultimatums makes you feel as if you finally found something special. A man baring his soul shows that he trusts you and in order for a man to trust you, he has to see you as different. Any man can take you to Strugglebees and a movie. Any man can tell you what he wants to do for you once you’re his girl. Any man can text you paragraphs and trick a few dollars on a birthday gift. To actually have a man open up enough to show his vulnerability proves a real investment. This is what you’ve been waiting to see, a man putting himself out there to show you who he is beyond the macho façade. At this moment you’re wide open like a dental exam. What happens following this level of emotional bonding where you both take off the masks? You fall head over heels quicker than normal. I told you all in Ho Tactics how exposing deep dark secrets builds trust extremely quick, bonds the mark to you, and softens him up to the point where he believes you’re down for him. The same thing happens here. By baring his soul, he goes from just some guy you like to someone you know. Women want to be able to believe in a man’s sincerity towards her. Defensive girls say, “I don’t believe shit these niggas say,” yet every woman has been guilty of putting their faith in a male they barely know. So here you are with a man who opens up like no other guy and that gives you every reason to believe in him, but does this act mean he’s for real or is something else going on that you may be missing in your excitement?

He’s not special just because he confides in you, and if you’re open off of that and naively feel this is a sign from the heavens, then you just haven’t dated quality men or known emotionally healthy men. Males aren’t emotionally repressed, they do open up, they do talk, and some do get comfortable enough to let you in. That doesn’t mean you cracked his code, it could mean that the door was already unlocked. Not every man is running Dick Tactics, lulling you to sleep with his sob story about abuse, being poor, and being neglected. Some will, but in the end it could just be a personality trait. It’s in your best interest to check your “Girl, he was crying on the phone saying he loved me,” ego. Instead of patting yourself on the back for getting a man to tell you his life story and express his emotions within a month, ask yourself, “What did I do that was so special.” If you didn’t pull anything out of him, and all of this shit was volunteered or came up naturally in conversation, then you didn’t do shit to earn his trust, the nigga is just talking. Don’t let your ignorance towards Emo men and your past experiences with so-called emotionally unavailable men fool you into believing you’re doing something novel.
What Does It Mean When A Man Falls Back?
What You Think It Means: *Crickets* You don’t know and you don’t care…or at least that’s what you tell people.
What It Really Mean: Few people want to think about why someone doesn’t want them, it’s depressing, so in response, the finger is pointed outwardly rarely inwardly. I’ve studied how women react to rejection for a long time. What I’ve found is that we live in a Brat Culture. Both men and women are guilty of this, but for this example let’s stick with women. There are many women that feel as if they should get what they want, that they are beyond being shitted on, and that because Daddy, Mommy, or the Grandparents placated their egos that everyone else will treat them like they’re special. In this life, you will learn that most men won’t want you in the way that the leading man wants the leading woman in a Romantic Comedy movie. This idea of guys spoiling you, baecations, and all the other #RelationshipGoals shit that other women attain, you don’t. You don’t ask why, you just make up some story about unfairness. The universe is laying out clues for you to adjust your behavior and mindset to get what you want, instead, you ignore and push on fueled by this bratty ego. Fuck him, nothing’s wrong with me. Fuck those hoes messing with ballers, they’re probably selling pussy anyway. To play Devil’s Advocate and say, “wait, maybe the signs are pointing to me having to step my game up by reevaluating the way I think and live,” is a foreign concept because you are in the business of protecting this image of yourself as good enough or a victim of circumstance. To prove this point, let’s look at how a typical woman reacts to things not going her way:
The first ego check comes when a man who gets your number doesn’t call you back. In your mind, even though you liked this guy and was hoping he would hit you up, you determine that he’s just a bitch boy because defensively you can’t allow thoughts of disappointment to seep in. The next ego check comes when a guy you’re actually dealing with falls back. Again, you brush it off as him just being a typical clown ass dude playing games because he’s immature. The final ego check comes after a guy who was with you, said he loved you, gassed you up, etc. falls back. This would be the perfect time to self-analyze, yet there is never any soul searching. It’s “fuck him, he was a bitch ass little dick ass broke ass nigga, anyway.” The Brat Culture has created overly sensitive women and men who can’t take rejection as a lesson so they interpret it as someone being worthless. They weren’t a loser when you were smiling every time you saw their text. They weren’t a fuck boy when you were out shopping for the perfect pair of shoes to wear on that date. They weren’t corny when you were cuddling on the couch and calling each other “babe”. To be rejected doesn’t send you off on a mission to explore what went wrong, it sends you to pity party city where you simply deflect what happened and repress the fact that you weren’t what someone wanted.
What Does It Mean When a Man Keeps Coming Back?
What You Think It Means: He realized his mistake. You showed him how great you were, and he failed to appreciate what he had. Now that time has passed he’s calling you, texting you, or maybe showing up at places he knows you visit. You’re not dumb, conversations like “remember the time we…,” “How has such and such been…,” or “I’ve been thinking about us…” is him trying to get his foot back in the door. Regardless of how you left things, he feels he can now come back and reestablish a friendship. That friendship will hopefully lead to a relationship, and since you two did have more good times than bad, this time around it will be perfect. Let’s keep it real, if the man you were once in love with could have acted the right way, there’s no telling how far you two could have gone. For him to come back saying that he’s improved puts ideas back in your head that this was who you were always meant to be with. Life is a series of lessons, and he learned one. Your soul mate isn’t out there, he was right under your nose, he just needed to mature. Him coming back is proof that real love doesn’t let go. That’s the story you tell yourself because it changes the past to make you feel better about how things ended. It wasn’t you that pushed him away, that wasn’t good enough, or who had flaws that made you just pussy or a placeholder. In the end, it was him who was the ignorant to your perfection.
What It Really Means: Men are creatures of habit. If a man gets hungry he orders from the same pizza place he’s used to not the new one. If a man gets lonely he calls up the same two or three women who he used to fuck with back in the day, he doesn’t go shoot his shot at a new one. Understand that men like the comfort of personalities they understand. A new girl doesn’t take jokes like you, she doesn’t share the same “remember when…” stories as you two do, and since he hasn’t had sex with her that switch where he can go from joking to being nasty isn’t there. With a new woman he has to be on his best behavior, with you he can say whatever because at the end of the day what’s the worst you can do? Hang up? Say “boy stop playing with me”? Block him? Every man keeps a girl in his phone who he can hit up when he’s bored. Every man has an ex who will give him the time of day again if he gets curved by a new girl who doesn’t see him as anything special. Know that men crave attention, they need their egos stroked, and they need positive reinforcement. “All of these girls out here that he can be with, but he’s coming back to me because what we had was real,” you’re about as bright as midnight. Just because you think a guy is god’s gift to you, doesn’t mean other women would give your clown ass crush the time of day. You would take him back and marry him if he asked, those other girls won’t even respond to his DMs. He runs back to your ass not because he misses you, but because you’re easy to impress.

What Does It Mean When You Give Too Many Fucks About Men?

If you are having negative results back to back, it’s time to look at how you feel inside and how that leads to how you act on the outside. Not how you think you act or imagine you act, but how you come off on dates, on the phone, etc. all of that has to be held up to the flame so you can improve. This isn’t to get a man; this is to understand where you are fucking up so you can become a better you. If you’re holding in hurt from being cheated on, if you’re holding in an inferiority complex in terms of how smart you aren’t, if you’re nervous about not being on the same level money wise or success wise as the type of men you want to date, or if you’re simply of the mind that it’s no point in dating because every man you ever met has disappointed you, then those insecurities will show when you talk to the opposite sex. You may think you have a good poker face, but trust that if a man has dated a lot of women or has been raised in a house with his mother or sisters, he knows that females are transparent. The reason men don’t want you on a real level or fall out of love with you is that they’re most likely seeing traits in you that you forgot where there or never realized where present. Passive aggressiveness is there for a reason. Being anxious to the point where you call and text repeatedly is there for a reason. Overreacting is there for a reason. Stalking someone’s social media is there for a reason. Pouting to get your way is there for a reason. Don’t just say, “I am who I am take it or leave it,” understand why you act the way you act because the shit you do is tied to unhealthy thoughts or traumatic experiences that need to be explored and eradicated so you don’t come off like every other typical chick.







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