How's dating one at a time working out for you? Meet him, start to like him, it doesn't work out (the last step happening AFTER you've already had sex with him). People from school thought you would be cuffed by now... rich husband, pampered, proof that you were always different, but instead of Carrie Bradshaw you're Basica Hell'nah because you don't know what you're doing! How many years will you CONTINUE to waste being a woman who falls fast, gets fucked, then gets sent back outside because her dating tactics are trash?
Year 1: You meet a a nice guy, you vibe, you go on three dates and now feel like he's THE ONE. All the other guys in your phone get ignored or receive dry responses, you're focused on HIM. ...a few months later you're still not in a relationship but this feels like true love.
He tells you that he loves you and you say it back. This is it, you've finally found your person. ...a month after this feeling he suddenly starts acting strange, not time for you, an attitude over nothing. What the fuck is his problem? You stop calling, he stops calling. You cave in and finally go see him-- get fucked, but it's not the same. He once again falls back. You NOW get the hint. It's over...
Year 2: You meet a nice guy, you vibe, you don't want to get hurt so you keep it at the talking stage, not wanting to move too fast. This makes him try HARDER. He's love bombing you, making promises, showing you all the ways he's different from that last guy. You give in, you LOVE that he's fighting to be with you. This feels like THE ONE.
...a few months later you catch him in a lie. He's not who you thought but you're falling for him, so you give him a second chance. ...a few months after that you're going crazy because you know you can't trust him. Lie on top of lie and you have to let go of the man you thought was special. It's over.
Year 3 - Year 5: You've been with an okay guy for two years. He's not someone you would typically date but he's always there for you, isn't a cheater or liar, but something is missing. He's not the best looking, doesn't have much money, and isn't that smart. But he's yours. So you hold on to it because at least he's willing to claim you unlike those last two.
Is this a man you would marry and have kids with? 16 year old you would be like "This guy? Nah. I'm too good for him." But you're older and less confident in what you can pull so you entertain the thought that you could make this man work because you're tired of starting over. Suddenly he's not acting the same. ...the next month he wants to "talk". He's not happy, he needs to work on himself, and he's been depressed for a long time and afraid to tell you. You try to salvage it, but you already know this feeling. It's over.
When a woman dates ONE at a time, trying to hit a home run instead of playing the percentages this is what happens. You strike out, and another year comes off your life. Every year you find one guy, who doesn't work out. Maybe you'll get into a 2 or 4 year relationship, but that doesn't work either.
You went from being that vibrant woman in her 20s who literally wasted year after year on men who let you down. Now you're much older, not that much wiser, and still hoping that the next guy who takes you out doesn't waste your time. A woman with Too Much Hope + No Common Sense + A Hard Dick = A Dumb Ass.
Ladies, it's time to wise the fuck up and recognize that there are too many inconsistent men to spend months only focused on ONE. When I say "date" it means dating, not sleeping with a man, not seeing him every day, just allowing him the honor of getting to know you via activities that show that he's putting in creative effort...
CREATIVE not Uber Eats, not coming over to his house to drink and watch bootleg movies on a fire stick, and not meeting up at some bar or lounge where you can't actually talk. Men who attempt to date you like you're a 19 year old thot shouldn't be in your phone, let alone between your legs.
"I can't do that, G.L. I don't have the time plus guys will think I'm a Ho," cries the brainwashed Basica. You're a woman, you're the trophy, you should be getting high level dates, gifts, and guys begging you to be their girlfriend but you'll never reach that level if you feel guilty. The person who you end up with, is the most important choice of your life. If anything is worth your effort it's that.
You aren't too busy to search the IG stories of a man who won't claim you. You aren't too busy to do detective work on an ex who you heard had a baby. You aren't too busy to play on the internet but you draw the line at dating multiple men? Maybe if you actually dated quality men you wouldn't need to take so many naps. Maybe if you hand the lady balls to go for what you want, and not take what's given you wouldn't be so jealous when you see other women out here cuffed, spoiled, and smiling! You're too busy to date multiple men, but you work overtime trying to keep a no good man housetrained. There is nothing that other women are doing that you can't so why are you sitting there single and miserable or in a situationship where you chase after a man who says he loves you but never shows it?
Not all men are manipulative narcissists. I'll go even further, MOST men aren't trash. There are so many quality men in this world but you're missing out on them because you don't know where to look, what to look for, or how to position yourself as a must-have for these kinds of quality men. Every few months I get emails from readers or past women I coached who prove that it's not hard to find your match. But you have to recognize that even the quality men are bias and suspicious. No man wants to accidentally end up with a bird so they test you.
Is she going to let me fuck too fast... Is she going to show signs of being mentally unstable... Does she communicate like a passive aggressive brat or a like a grown woman... Is this a woman with self-esteem and poise or another "cute in the face, crazy in the mind," basic woman?
I don't care if he's an extroverted athlete or an introverted CPA, males today are picky, not when it comes to the women they chase for sex, but are very picky when it comes to the women they chase for a relationship. Do you hear me!? Understand that the game is rigged even before your first date. I don’t care how pretty, smart, or sophisticated you are, men mentally size you up, put you in a box based on other women they’ve known, and treat you a certain way—all based off assumptions. He can't afford to wife up the wrong woman, so he will test you to see if you can prove you're different from the last few girls he fucked and ghosted... that proof requires actions not words.
This is why it’s crucial to stand the fuck up, not shrink your personality, and show them exactly who you are, a Spartan who has read my books and knows how to shine her light! The women who imprint themselves as “I’m not like those other bitches,” instead of simply saying it, can’t be labeled, they come off as special, and men will automatically chase. Are you listening yet or are you still focused on making a man who doesn't want you want you again? Men should be crying over you. Men should be banging down your door, MULTIPLE. That's power, that's your birth right, that's the ERA you need to be embracing...
The Grass Is Greener!
Do you realize how many NEW men come onto the dating market each day? There was no one on the apps last week, now some guy who is finally ready to date after a breakup is on there today: Wealthy, handsome, and well trained by his ex to treat a woman the way a woman needs to be treated-- but you're missing out on him because you ONLY want to date "Marcus who took you bowling and made you laugh." Huh?
You're exclusive and loyal to a man that took you out ONCE. You deleted your dating apps, stopped eye fucking men in public, and won't answer your DMs because you went out ONCE? You're dicked whipped by potential and accepting house dates based on what exactly? Oh! You had a few good conversations with a man who has his own place and no kids. You're all in and off the market while this "bae" is still fucking 2 other women. Are you delusional, slow, or just uneducated in the ways of how a man thinks and operates?
I met a nurse last year who worked crazy shifts, and still found time to get taken out twice a week, and not by the same men. That same woman emailed me a picture of her engagement ring and a thank you. Why? Because I've been telling you all to date multiple men for 10 fucking years. You can't afford to be tired, frustrated, or delete an app just because it's not working. Persistence breeds results! Those of you who have read my books and followed them, not half way, not some times, but like a fucking Spartan-- win.
What Men Think Of Overly Loyal Women...
Little Mrs. Basic always thinking about what a man likes never about what's best for you. "I can't date multiple men cus may think I'm a Ho. Men want to see that you're down for them during the dating stage," Of course they do, Basica! They want to know that before they even give you an official title you're going to submit and show him that your pussy is his pussy unconditionally.
AMC popcorn and Facetime calls have calling him "Bae" way before he claims you. You're creaming on his dick as he asks you "who's pussy is this," meanwhile he still as a dating app installed on his phone. You see him as your soul mate. He sees you as seasonal. Pay fucking attention!
Placeholders fall into place based on basic attention, treatment, and words of affection. In the end, they get used up and abandoned with nothing to show for it but trust issues and a cold heart. Ask yourself right now are you a Placeholder still out here wasting her time or a Game Changer that currently has these men wrapped around her finger?
Here are the 3 things you have to know about any man you date and through these 3 things this is how you stay one step ahead:
1) We as men
