“What Can I Do To Kick It Off How Bout I Cum All On Your Dick
And Then I Lick It Off?” – Freaky Girl Remix

Foxy Brown’s Ill NaNa CD was an amalgam of Nasir Jones and Shawn Carter’s ghostwriting and it sold more than both of their albums at the time. It proved that some things sound harder if a girl’s saying them. It’s like putting Brad Pitt in an action movie, it’s cool. But now put Angelina Jolie in that role instead, and it’s double tight because people don’t expect the chick to go so hard.

Rap music is the same way, female MC’s aren’t suppose to rap as good as the males, even if they spit something half way decent they’re considered hot, but imagine if they spit something that was better… This brings me to Nicki Minaj, Nicki the ninja, Nicki the Harajuku Barbie, etc… I’ve been waiting for Nicki Minaj to come out since Biggie died. Because when Biggie died, Lil Kim died too. Sure Kimberly Jones is still around dropping half ass bars and dressing tacky, but the lyrics Biggie wrote for her is what made her the female G.O.A.T. Foxy was good to a point, Eve had her chance. None of them have mixed flow/punchlines/and sex they way Nicki has. When I heard the sucker free mixtape this was my reaction: “Damn she’s nasty, oh that punchline was sick, wow she went introspective, that was deep”. It took me all of ten tracks to fall in love with Nicki Minaj.

“Bitches is softer than Al Dente, cut from a different kenta. tell em I’m the ninja,
Weezy is my sensei. So I call him splinter, faster than a sprinter. gimme my chopsticks, I’ll have these rap bitches for dinner.” – Go Hard

Now I know what you’re thinking, the only reason you like her is because she’s attractive. And truthfully, the open leg, phat juice box, mixtape cover aside—I honestly didn’t think she was that cute, until a year later when she put the black and pink weave in her hair. I was more impressed by the similes, metaphors, and wacky voices. Songs like “Coochie Shop” and “Beef Stew” showed creativity that had been lacking in hip hop, and “I get crazy” proved that she could not only hold her own with arguably the greatest rapper alive but out rap him as well. A year ago I was in LA telling everybody that Nicki Minaj was tight. I went to Baltimore with the Beam me up Scotty mix tape forcing all of my boys to listen to it. Next thing you know she’s blown up to the point where I don’t have to put people on to her music… I have to defend her as an artist. The more famous Nicki got the more people wanted to hate on her. First girls wanted to be her “Kesha Minaj, Harajuku Quandra, etc…” then like anything that’s hot people begin to tear it down.

If someone wants to be a Barbie or a Minaj or whatever, does it really bother you that much?

She can’t rap:Rapping is rhyming words together. Rodney Dangerfield could fucking rap. The Chicago Bears of 1985 could rap. Being a MC is being able to use different rhyme patterns, construct original punch lines, tell stories, etc… Nicki Minaj is a MC.

Her voice is annoying: That’s your opinion. Some people hate Slim Shady’s voice, some hate Gucci Mane’s voice, most men think all females have annoying voices it’s all good. To me Nick sounds good, British voice, New York accent, or whatever.

All she talks about is sex: Yeah and all Jay-Z raps about is money. Do you listen to music or skim through asshole? And really, you don’t like sex? There are no such things as conservative rap fans so go eat a dick and listen to Brooks and Dunn.

Her butt is fake: Are you her doctor? Were you there for the surgery? But more importantly why the fuck do you care? That’s like me saying LL Cool J’s abs are painted on. How dumb does that sound?

In the end Nicki Minaj’s success will be determined by her songs. And while it’s impressive that someone without an album has this much hype, the final test has yet to come. Nicki Minaj is not only the best female rapper in history, she could become top 5 male or female. I’m rooting for Lewinsky.

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