No matter if you’re a Hot Girl, City Boy, Book Worm, or anti-social home body, the summer will drop someone in your lap. I get the most emails asking for advice in July and August, mostly from women who are having all levels of dick thrown at them and they have no idea how they suddenly got so popular. Here’s what I’ve seen over the past week: G.L. I met this guy at a gas station and now he’s trying to take me on vacation. G.L. this guy from high school popped back up, telling me how I was the one that got away. G.L. here’s a screenshot from [insert famous person’s name] what do I DM him back?

Women win in the summer! This shit is like being in college where you’re blitz by cute dick, rich dick, broke dick, ugly dick, simp dick, player dick, foreign dick, sponsor dick, and it’s overwhelming because too many women don’t know how to juggle men. Men lose the fall and winter because they don’t realize they’re only getting attention because their summer fling ghosted that ass. Today I want to address the women that settle and men that allow themselves to be settled for…  Ladies you should be ale to date multiple men (date not fuck, Thotiana) who you actually want to be with not waste time with guys who don’t even get your pussy moist. Fellas you should have the confidence in yourself and wisdom to know when a woman is really into you versus one who just needs a text buddy or a free meal. Buckle up, drop your defenses, and allow me to put a much needed foot in all your asses…

Attention Is For Peasants

How many guys do you have in your phone right now actively messaging you or calling you. That shit’s not rhetorical. Pause and add them up. Now out of all of those men, how many of them do you really want? How many of them can actually bring something to your table? How many of them are impressive enough to put in front of your family and friends and get props? I’ll answer for you– maybe one. There are men that blow you away and who you obsess over, then there are the rest— the “he’s okay” crew who you pick up when bored.  Most women don’t need to manipulate for sex, mind you, but they will manipulate for attention. Right now, there’s a man whose only purpose in a woman’s life is to keep her company via text while she’s at work. He thinks he’s in there, that he’s earning points, but once home, she’s on the phone with the guy she really wants or stressing over the guy that doesn’t want her. Right now there is a man reading this who thinks he is his girlfriend’s first choice, but in reality he’s not even the second or third. The only reason that man was granted access was because he was the easiest option in terms of getting a commitment.

Men don’t want to hear these things, because it creates doubt and gives way to paranoia. Women know how to work their magic and charm to get what they want, and I respect those traits when it’s used to get their first choice. However, too many women misuse their skill sets to prey on easy men, instead of the ones they actually want. The average woman doesn’t feel as comfortable going at Man A (her dream guy) as she does going after Man C (her consolation guy). For some reason, she can Spartan Up or use Ho Tactics on the second stringers, but doesn’t feel right using it on the Starters. In your phone you have a bunch of Man C’s, the nice guys, the lames, the simps, the friend zoners, etc… you’re wasting their time and they are wasting your time, but again. You take what you’re given, you don’t go after the Man A’s that you want because– duh you’re a scared ass. The funny thing is that men tend to say misogynistic things because most of those clowns on your timeline have been the Man C, the one that got used for attention.

I’ve seen social media rants from guys who vent about those women who claim there are no good men left. These males are those allegedly good men who are trying to step up, but are constantly passed on. Although these men are bitter, they have a valid point. When a woman says, “Why can’t I find a good man,” she really means, “Why can’t I find a good man that looks the way I want him to look and likes me back?” There are more men struggling to get pussy than ones that get it daily, but the internet doesn’t talk about these men. Instead we focus on the Players who girls chase, not the low-key guys that girls curve. Man C outnumbers Man A in this world, but that fact is never talked about. It’s like rap music, there are way more Black men going to college than trapping out of Bando’s, but dudes ain’t spitting bars about “Watch me walk that stage, nigga/ Magna Cum Laude,” cus it ain’t cool. Men aren’t talking about sex struggle, because they want to play the pimp role, but if real life were Love Island, no one would step forward to pick them. This is why guys take to twitter and talk about what they won’t do to get pussy as if they get pussy, but they do the MOST while secretly  trying to figure out how other guys are actually getting away with Netflix & Chill. I had one guy email asking, “Are men really getting sex without dates?” He wasn’t a clown; he was a normal guy who is trying to figure out where he was going wrong.

Hot Girl Shit

Ass ate, bills paid, flights booked, rent money, head when she’s bored without reciprocation. These aren’t rap lyrics, ladies today have power and know how to use it… sometimes… I know women who are man-eaters, but only when put around men they see as weak. They go from getting their hearts broken and being exploited to scooping up a Carlton Banks type whose sole purpose is to be Settle Dick that never steps out of line. Why are there women weak for one man but strong around others? Confidence! A woman standing in front of Trey Songz is rarely as confident as when she’s standing in front of Andre the postal worker who’s had a crush on her for two years. When a girl knows a boy is on her clit, she acts as if she has a license to kill.

All these guys are the same regardless of looks, money, or popularity, but she puts one on a pedestal, loses her confidence, and gets fucked over because she’s intimidated. I’ve tried to teach women to be unapologetically confident. Many can’t hit that switch, so they get played, and then rebound with Settle Dick aka Man C aka The Simp aka The Nice Guy aka “the last guy left in her phone at the end of summer”. The Guys who girls know like them are safe and easy to charm, they text back, they’re consistent, but they aren’t who you REALLY WANT, are they beloved? “See NC, I Spartan’d Up,” No, Basica, you didn’t. That man is a weakling. You went down a level to the JV team and flexed. Dominate on the Varsity level, and then I’ll give you props. Just as men use their Bottom Bitch to boost their egos, women use Settle Dick to regain confidence, feel loved, and when she has no more need for him, she’ll get back on the market, most likely to be played by another man she places on a pedestal. Which leads us to…

Settle Dick Season

IMG_1474Cuffing season has been hyped to the point of annoyance. Lists upon lists stuffed with young ass rules and played out tips about what you should be doing to get cuffed. Nevertheless, when you strip away the jokes about Summer Hoes turning into Winter Wifeys, you get something very real, PANIC. No one wants to be alone during the next few months as the weather changes and social activities become less frequent. Her Hot Girl summer started with a trip to the islands and ended with her riding the face of her crush. Your Hot Girl summer started with a few dates but ended with you still fucking that ex from two years ago. You promise yourself that next year is going to be different, by any means necessary.  It won’t be, because you lack the confidence to bend your world to your will. The reality is that most women play it safe all year, waiting to be chose, dating one guy at a time, agreeing to not put a title on things while he figures out what he wants, and all the other basic bitch relationship mistakes, only to realize they should have been going hard off the rip.

Cuffing Season doesn’t make most women aggressive in a Spartan way; it actually makes the majority lower their requirements. Enter The Settle Dick… The guys you really wanted during the summer, they turned out to be shit. The IG guy with the epic beard who started liking your pics and slid into your DMs—gone. The local celebrity your homegirl hooked you up with who talked a good game about wanting someone down to earth to build with—gone. The guy who wasn’t your type but was chasing you, his ugly ass wasn’t even loyal—gone! Then there was the situationship guy you tried to be exclusive but not official with—He Fell all the way back with no warning or excuse. You were going to fuck up the summer with this new attitude and hairstyle, but you did what you always do; date losers and put your eggs in the basket of lames who talked a good game. Now it’s time to snatch up the leftovers.

Bench Player Anthem

IMG_0442Suddenly that guy in the Friend Zone starts looking like Filet Mignon. You shouldn’t shit where you eat, but it is Cuffing Season and you’re too lazy to go hunting so you start sizing up your supposedly platonic male friend. Your “buddy” wasn’t on your radar during the summer months or when you had new dick blowing up your phone. Now that the well’s dried up, you start to look at him differently. He is kinda cute… he knows your ways, doesn’t mind your negatives… and he’s always there whenever you need him. The Friend Zone Guy could be single or he could be in some half-ass relationship with a girl you keep telling him isn’t shit. Regardless of his status, you are confident that you can have him because you know the only reason he’s your friend now, is because he was crushing on you back then. This is a guy who wanted you, but who you shot down and put in that platonic cage. Now you want to unlock that cage and give him a shot because you are alone. Men aren’t born yesterday, but they get infant dumb when pussy’s thrown in their face. The girl you call friend but have always wanted is calling you up to the main roster, not because she saw something in your eyes one night, but because she always saw you as “In Case of Emergency Dick.” Wintertime comes with a thirst to have her booty rubbed and a want to exchange gifts on Christmas Day. You exist to get her though this rough patch.

4e85100589be0Fellas, stop thinking you’re smarter than these girls! Any woman who has the courage to flirt and seduce can get 99% of the men they go after, but they use that power on beta males like you because you don’t scare her, again, you’re the safe option. What’s a pawn to a Queen? Useful at times, but an afterthought in the bigger game. Women use men for attention all the time, B. Yet this time a year as summer rolls into fall it becomes deeper than texting because her phone’s dry. It becomes a lot more dangerous because some girls are actually down to get into a relationship in order to push away loneliness. It’s time to look at the circumstances surrounding her attraction to you, because the reason you may have her attention now, may be the result of you being her last available option.

The Nice Guy

1394832166880Being nice to a woman isn’t the same as being right for a woman. There are countless men who nice their way into the panties and hearts of girls who were cold towards them at first. The reason being, her options when she met you have dried up, causing her to warm up to the idea of any man is better than no man. There is nothing wrong with being nice; this isn’t about holding doors open, it’s about a lack of excitement due to a man being overly accommodating. A lot of men are cool, but few are amazing, and since childhood, girls have been attracted to the sprinkles because vanilla is too boring. Nice guys get their shot under two circumstances; a woman’s been single too long or a woman’s rebounding from a bad boy that played her out. The last guy she fell for could turn her pussy on like a faucet with just a look. He knew how to talk to her aggressively and bring out the submissive side without trying. Women are easily dicknotized by attitude and swagger, and by the time they snap out, they realize they were acting just as basic as the ratchets they criticize. Never again, she promises herself. Animalistic passion made her stress and bomb dick made shorty play herself. At that moment, that frustrated woman realizes that she would rather be bored and stress free with a man she “kinda likes” than chase behind a man who doesn’t see her as special. Enter the Nice Guy.

find-good-manThe Nice Guy is that dude who tries too hard to be perfect, and remains consistent in his effort to win a woman over no matter how many times she curves him. He’s there to compliment you, he wants to come pick you up and take you out, and he wants to take it day by day and not force anything sexually unless you’re ready. These guys prove that “good men” do exist… BUT they’re dry as fuck. You don’t want to hear how beautiful you look for the fourth time. You get a “Miss You,” text and it makes you roll your eyes.

He’s trying to take you to the best restaurant in the city, yet you would rather sit at home and watch Netflix than waste hours talking about nothing with him. Everything this guy does annoys you, and you can’t figure out why. All your friends are telling you how lucky you are to have found someone that values you. God knows that the last guy only sent “Is you still up,” text and thought dating was sitting in a parked car eating fast food while talking about income inequality. The Nice Guy is giving you what you said you wanted from a man, but he doesn’t do it for you, there’s no electricity. He’s too nice, too soft, not authoritative, and his tricking comes too easy for you to even feel like you’re working a Ho Tactic mark. The Nice Guy never gets told, “Boy Bye, you’re corny.” In the back of your mind, you know that you may need him down the line to change a tire or to trick a birthday gift, so you keep him around. He gets his texts ignored, his calls sent to voicemail, and when he does get through, you’re always fake busy. That is until Cuffing Season.

You tried dating for passion and you ended up lowering your self-esteem, so why not give the Nice Guy a shot? Here’s where you fuck up, ladies. If your only attraction to a man is the fact that he’s attracted to you, then it will never work! Women are wired to feel excitement.  “How important is chemistry,” it’s all there is! If a woman doesn’t vibrate near the same level as a man, then it’s only a matter of time before her body starts craving someone more compatible. But you don’t hear me tho… By dating this Nice Guy, you’re trying to rewire yourself to like all the things that make your skin crawl, and if you are desperate enough, brainwashing will work for a period. You can end up falling for the Nice Guy, but it’s not a foundation built to last. Nice Guy will make it through Cuffing Season, you’ll enter a honeymoon stage where you forget that he’s not your type… but he won’t survive once those other men who weren’t checking for you begin to look your way again. You’ll think, “I can do better,” and you’ll feel guilty the first time, but that voice won’t go away. The Nice Guy never had your heart; therefore, it’s only a matter of time before a new man comes around flirting with you, energizing you, and causing you to fantasize about sitting on his face. A new man can’t take you from a boyfriend that never had you. You may have played the role, but you were never his woman, you let him fill a seat until better options arrived. These Nice Guys were always meant to be something to do, never someone to last.

The Desperate Option

BowDownFellas: Are you a man or are you a simp? A man approaches women with confidence, control, and aggression. Meaning you stare into her eyes as if you’ve already deep dicked her soul and you spit truth, not game, that tattoos her brain. Don’t tell her how pretty she is, you tell her where you two are going that weekend. You don’t ask if you can have her number, you take her number as if she doesn’t have a choice. You don’t waste her time with chitchat; you cut the conversation short, pull her in for a hug, and whisper that she better pick up when you call. Dominant women are attracted to dominant men. Most of you can’t control an initial engagement like that because you don’t believe in yourselves. Men talk big behind a keyboard, but falter face to face. You sit there all meek, feeding her cheesy lines that she’s heard before. You list all the things you want to do for her, be to her, and how different she is from the next bitch… five minutes later her coochie has dried to the point where if the sun hit it, you could start a brush fire in her panties.

Bro, you’re a Kia; you’re trying hard to sell these extra features because you don’t believe in your brand. You should be a Mercedes, you don’t list your features, the luxury is evident. You may come away with a number, but again, it’s to service her boredom. She wants a text buddy and you take this as a sign that you’re in, but your ass is staying on the outside like a front porch. Go ahead and take her out, buy her gifts, text her good morning every day, and feel stupid when she pops up on social media talking about how she’s bored with no one to talk to. You don’t make women excited, you make them yawn, and that’s because you don’t know how to be yourself. You call girls hoes, because you don’t know how to crack the pretty pussy code. You can buy pussy, but you can’t buy personality. You can spoil princesses with toys, but it takes a King to satisfy a Queen. You’re doing the most because you know you can’t get a real woman without gimmicks. Don’t worry, there is a silver lining where simps finally inherit the earth, it’s called Cuffing Season.

A woman who had no time for you back in July will suddenly have time for you in October. She’s actually texting back, agreeing to go out, and laughing at your jokes. Lonely women allow men they don’t want to nice their way into pussy. The difference is between you and the savages that hit and quit is that you aren’t in it for the pussy, you actually want to build with her, make her your girlfriend, and do all the romantic things you believe a woman should experience. All men have romantic bones, but the difference between a smart man and a naïve one is that he discriminates. Did you stop to think why that girl who had no time for you is suddenly making time? Did you stop to think why suddenly she’s staying on the phone for hours instead of saying, “Let me call you right back?” I tell women to ask themselves, “What does a man like about me?” Most don’t know because they are too busy soaking up attention and ignoring the ulterior motive. He likes me because I’m cool as hell and different—yeah okay. Don’t be dense! Every man needs to ask the same question, “What does a woman like about me?”

Game-IndiaIt took her weeks to warm up to you, not because she didn’t trust you, not because she had a man, it was because you weren’t what she wanted. You still aren’t what she wants. What you are is the epitome of “Any attention is good attention when you aren’t getting any.” You’re the real life version of the lame that posts “I would marry you and raise your son,” on Draya’s Instagram page. You’re the creep that writes, “I’d pay to have her sit on my face,” under India Westbrook’s picture. You are the embodiment of the attention women usually laugh at, yet because you’re the only attention in town, you get a shot. Understand that she will never take you serious. The solution? Have self-respect!

What’s going to happen is you’re going to fall in love, start planning out a future with this woman, and all it’s going to take is a dude to slide in her DMs talking about “your boyfriend don’t got to know,” and with that one line, her vagina will get wetter for that stranger than it’s ever been for you. All it’s going to take is for some new dude at work to give her that look from across the room, and the next thing you know she’s imagining him when you’re on top of her. She’s not a hoe or a slut, she’s a woman that tried to dumb down her desires, and failed. Don’t blame her for leading you on; blame yourself for being the type of man that tried too hard to fit her foot in that glass slipper. If a girl doesn’t respond to you from the start, fuck her! Real men don’t placate, that’s simp etiquette.

The On Again Ex

let-it-burnWomen love refurbished dick. They will sing you a song about how they’ve moved on, write an essay about how the new her is wiser than the old her… then pop up like, “We’re talking again, but I’m not taking it serious, just seeing how he acts.” These women think old dick is harmless just as an alcoholic thinks one beer won’t lead to relapse. People love to lie to themselves, but the fraudulence of going backwards because you aren’t strong enough to go forwards is the worst. An Ex-boyfriend who she swore off, blocked, and told all her friends that she was so happy to have gotten over, pops up during Cuffing Season and suddenly he’s a viable option again because her lazy ass doesn’t know how to meet new men.

The most common Settle Dick will always be the man she has a history with. Unlike the Nice Guy they have combustible chemistry. When it comes to sex, her sleep number won’t go up. And we all know that basics love to recycle dick as if they’re somehow saving their soul by giving pussy to someone that already hurt them. The irony is that a woman knows why an Ex is sniffing around, yet secretly jumps for joy, because she is starved for some kind of attention. Let’s list the emotions a weak bitch goes through after an Ex shows back up.

First, it’s Disgust: Can you believe he had a nerve to hit me up? He must think I’m stupid. He should have realized what he had before he messed it up. Followed by Curiosity: Do you think he’s serious? Why would he be reaching out now? Should I respond back? Finally, she gives into Defeat: I’m going to go meet up with him just to hear him out. We got a lot of things off our chest, and I realize that I wasn’t perfect either. We’re not together officially; it’s more like a probationary period. Rumble weak bitch Rumble!

graduate bus sceneMen are just as guilty of trying to breathe life into a dead relationship as women are, and it’s not just about wanting sex, you’re both lonely and stuck. You may not belong to each other but you carry this torch as if your souls are connected. We May Not Be Together But We’ll Always Be Linked. Save the fake deep quotes for Tumblr. You two aren’t soulmates; you’re just two lonely people who don’t know how to move on, so you re-imagine your failed relationship as some Cosmic Soap Opera. Young & the Textless, All in My Feelings, ass relationship. There isn’t anything destined about second chances, you end up back where you started by choice. Verbally you shut the door, but mentally you never took that option off the table when you broke up, so it isn’t a surprise that you ended up where you knew you could. There’s a classic film called The Graduate. The couple break up and the man goes through all of this drama to win his girl back before she gets married. The film ends with them finally reunited and sitting on a bus together with a joint look of, “what the fuck was the point?” You don’t really want each other, you want to recreate a magic that was never meant to be permanent, and most likely wasn’t even that fucking special in the way your revisionist mind made it out to be. Cuffing Season ends like The Graduate, all this drama, only to realize that you were chasing a feeling of companionship that would never live up to expectations.

Never Be A Settle Option!

Winners-WinI want every man to reflect on his current role in a woman’s life. Are you Man A, the trophy who she obsesses over, annoys, moves too fast with, and is always responsive to? Or Man C, the guy she settles for, who she has to let grow on her, and whose appeal is that you actually commit and give attention, when other guys give her the run around? You think you’re Man A or maybe you don’t mind being Man C because you are reaping the rewards. The point is that you need to figure out a woman’s agenda. The average man isn’t as emotionally hard as he acts, and the backlash of misplaced love will crumble his ass in ways he never imagined. Again, let’s go back to the fact that we as males don’t talk about feelings in a real way. We layer on armor and act as if we don’t care about women. We create labels that make them into objects, because we know that those that get close have too much power over our minds. Hoes win for a reason. Girls who don’t want you get chased for a reason. Unique women that snatch souls smell the best and taste the sweetest, because they project sex and power. You want that so bad, but that doesn’t mean you sell your soul for it.

There is nothing more harmful to a man than a woman who doesn’t want him. As a man, you need to understand your emotions and stop living life in a shell. You pretend to be her top choice, you pretend to be confident, but you’re scared to death that she’s going to reject you. Your money isn’t long enough. Your face isn’t cute enough. Your dick doesn’t make her cum. Your personality is so boring that she can’t even put her phone down to look you in your eye. False thoughts will eat at you until you actually start to believe that negativity! Be stronger than that.

Men don’t actually hate women, they hate not being good enough for the women they want the most. You are as good as you believe you are, so get your head back in the game. Stop running from your feelings and letting the right women walk while allowing the wrong women to get you open and ruin you! The same way women go insane trying to fix a man, men break down under pressure of not being able to make a woman content. It’s okay to feel lost, that doesn’t make you less of a man, but pretending like you’re cool does. Players usually start as nice guys; it was fear that drove them to see women as nothing but pussy because their heart couldn’t take being hurt again. Yes, women manipulate, and do it well, but it’s not about their offense, it’s about your lack of defense. Women will continue to settle for less, so long as less is an option. Stop coming at their necks and point the finger inward. Why are you a grown ass man allowing yourself to be used? Focus on yourself and stop thirsting to be a last resort for a damaged chick. This is the season where women who weren’t checking for you make time for you all of a sudden. You don’t need a woman on your team who couldn’t spot the greatness in you while other men were in her face. Always be first never be next.

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